Baby Mama Syndrome

What it look like good folk? Its me...Steez...doin how I do...givin yall some of these chronicles. Lightning has delayed the Ravens vs Jets game. So I figured I would put this joint down for yall. Summer is pretty much over...days are warm...nights are becoming more and more frigid here on the east coast. In particular here in the city of brotherly thugs...oops I mean LOVE. Not much swingin personally or in the news that I can think of. Everyone has football fever...myself included. So lets get to these here chronicles....shall we?

As I said above fall is upon us. The sun is setting earlier. Kids are back in school. And with that you must be aware of certain infections...viruses...and ailments. Flu...common cold....swine flu...re vitaligo....you name it...you need to watch out for it. But I was looking at recent reports about boxer Floyd Mayweather Jr. and a situation with his baby mama that let me know that there is another pandemic looming. Baby Mama Syndrome. Family it is spreading fast and is as deadly as anything you've ever seen. This post is more for the ladies to help them identify the symptoms. So....walk with me

Symptoms
1. Treachery. Flat out. Treachery is the easiest symptom to identify. This form of treachery is identified by the inherent need to do something distructive to the father of your children. Most importantly it is your willingness to perform said act of treachery even if it is to your own detriment. Take the aforementioned Mayweather situation. Now...the initial reports was that Floyd whooped her ass. Because he came to the house and it was dirty...an altercation ensued and he supposedly put heavy hands on her. If this is the case..Floyd deserves whatever punishment he gets. BUT then the story changed...and Floyd was eventually arrested for grand theft larceny. In the heat of the argument he supposedly stole her iPhone. Now, an iPhone is what 400 bucks? Floyd makes over 20 million a fight. Is sending this man to jail worth losing the security he is providing for you and your child by being free? Bitch got an ACUTE case of baby mama syndrome.

2. Lazyness. Now this one is a given. Being that the difference between a mother and a baby mama is lazyness...or lack thereof. If you've gone to college then popped out some kids...and the best thing you can think to do is apply for public assistance...not out of necessity...but out of sheer lazyness and being unwilling to do whatever needs to be dont to care for your child...whether the man is around or not. You may want to seek help...cause it sounds like you have a bad case of Baby Mama Syndrome

3. Failure. Now this one is more complicated. Because in failure I don't mean just fucking up. But if you have kids...and you aint shit. You don't have a good job(or no job at all), can't pay your bills, can't provide an adequate life for you OR your children...and you can't rightfully blame that on the economy, illness, or lazyness. No, your only excuse is you can't do productive shit because you have the kids...you have Baby Mama Syndrome. I point to Bitch Treachery with this one. Now this broad has attended college and unlike many of us other young blacks. GRADUATED. But somehow she works a job that is reserved for teens that just left highschool. Her excuse is that the school that she works at is the school where our daughter goes(and now our oldest son). So its "easier" and "more convenient". Ignoring the fact that if she lived up to any potential or expectation she would have all the resources i.e. car, money etc. to make any other arrangement just as convenient.

I urge you guys to keep an eye out for these symptoms...and if you can think of more..please feel free to leave them for us to read. Also if you can think of any remedies that do not entail swift slaps or punches to the mouth...feel free to share those as well. LOL.

I'm out....

Barnacle B!tches/N!ggas

What it look like good folk? Its that maniacal square back with these chronicles. Miss me? I'm sure yall did...well I hope yall did. So whats been crackin...Man I was just watchin sportcenter and some dumb nigga that plays for the Dolphins lost a 50,000 dollar diamond earring at practice...it fell out on the field and they can't find it...peep the niggas spent like an hour raking the field after practice trying to find it...LOL. I'm sure one of them rookies thats finna get cut picked that bitch up and is gonna sell it and get his mama out the hood...well not completely out...but out of the shithole she's in now...lol. "They shoulda never gave you niggas MONEY!!!!"(c) Dave Chapelle as Rick James. Um what else..Damn...T.I. done got arrested again. What the fuck Clifford? Drugs...honestly I think that was Tiny drugs...but the nigga prolly gonna go down this time...just got out the bing...and to my knowledge he doesn't have info on another murder to save him this time. Damn....Ah well he's rich and we aint...so since Philly is trying to charge us to blog...I should get on with the chronicles....shall we....

As you read above...and I referenced in the picture this entry is about Barnacle Bitches/Niggas. Now to fully understand what I'm talking about I guess I should give a crude definition on what a barnacle is. A barnacle is an aquatic parasite that often sticks itself to other aquatic wildlife...most notable whales. And they will also attach themselves to the hulls of ships in the ocean. They are not dangerous or detrimental to whichever host they choose. Mostly they are just ugly. In some instances if enough barnacles attach themselves to the hull of a ship they can effect the speed of the vessel and the fuel requirements. Fucked up right? Thats why a lot of ships that are out at sea for long periods of time have someone that will go down and scrape the barnacles off when the ship docks to refuel or whatever.....okay class dismissed

So I know you're thinking....where is this square ass dude going with the Bill Nye bullshit. Simple. Ask yourself have you or someone you know been effected by this kind of person in real life? A muhfucka that is just THERE. They don't enhance shit they touch. Nor do they really take away from it. I'm sure you have. I know I have....and I know yall know her name. *Pauses while audience whispers Bitch Treachery to themselves*. Yeah. Walk with me. As I told yall I moved out of the house...and she knew I was leaving...knowing she can't afford to pay the rent to live there. So today she asked me about some things about picking our son up from daycare. I asked how she was going to get him from me(as she doesn't know my current residence). She said "you can just drop him off" I was like "where?" ....to which she replied "at the house" Now...as I said...she knew I was leaving...in actuality as I told you guys she brought it up to me before I brought it up to her. In any event when I responded with the "well you can't afford to stay there and I told the landlord I was leaving so she thought you were too" she lost it...got on some shit about me not providing for the kids. Family I've been sleeping on a hot ass couch for the majority of this heat wave Philly summer. All the while paying rent for her barnacle ass to sit up on the bed I paid for, in the air conditioned room. cooking meals..etc. How long was I supposed to do this? Oh did I mention barnacles will stay wherever they are until removed by force..thats why whales in the wild are usually covered with them...who is gonna get them off? Fuck her and the whale she rode in on...she can go stay with her mom...who is another more crafty barnacle bitch.

Recently I've been told some stories by a friend of mine...who we'll call...Alfred. About a particular barnacle bitch/nigga in their life. This particular barnacle doesn't even know they are a barnacle. Which is fucked up because they don't know how unsightly and unwanted they really are. The thing about barnacles is that as I said...they are harmless. So you have people that will just "let them be". But why let a muhfucka slow you down or have you going out of your way to refuel when you shouldn't have to. People and friends should not be unwanted or unsightly. And they should never be a burden. So if you got someone in your life like that..scrape that bitch off the next time you dock. They are just making you more and more ugly.

Lastly, in dealing with barnacle bitches/niggas. You need to know who and what you are. As I said...whales are pretty much defenseless. Half the time they don't even know the barnacle is there. And the other half they don't care. There is nothing wrong with being a whale. Live your life...but you bet not ask me to get a barnacle off your back...you good playa...that shit don't even look like a barnacle...pass it off as a mole. Now if you're a ship...you have shit to do. You need to look presentable and be unhindered at all time. scrape them off and keep it pushin under dig? And once you show that you are really serious about being barnacle free people around you will help scrape them off too. So ask yourself are you a barnacle or a ship?

Before I bounce I wanna give a shoutout to a new reader that let me know she dug these chronicles..so family welcome the homie Janice G to the table...Janice be careful everything is square here don't get stabbed with a corner....

I'm out....