What it look like good folk? Its ya main square Dr. Steezenstein...at your service. I'm currently getting over some flu like ailment that completely ruined my Valentines plans. Ah well, I'm here now. Hope all yall have been well since we last spoke. Yo...how about Uncle Sam took my income tax return. LOL...yeah the student loan issue finally caught up. Oddly enough I'm not really givin a fuck about that. Maybe I will later...but not now. But lets get on to this here blog...shall we?
Well family, this edition of the chronicles finds your old host in a bit of an emotional pickle. Since everything with with Bitch Treachery has been bobsledding down that slippery slope, this here blog has been one of my few true outlets. I can come on here, say what I want...and nobody judges me. Well, you probably do...but until you get your own blog..who cares what you think. LOL. But, my day to day life is much different. I don't have much to call my own anymore. And honestly I don't know how I feel about that. I'm definitely not as sad or angry as I once was...but is replacing that with indifference or trepidation the way to go? Probably not.
Since leaving married life behind...and all the turmoil that mine brought, I find myself trying to shoehorn myself back into normalcy. Or at least what I believe normal should be. Through it all, I still haven't found a sturdy shoulder to cry on, a stoic face to confide in, or a bleeding heart to tell my story. But quite the opposite, since I have escaped life from behind enemy lines, I have become the equivalent of a war vet with PTSD. I get a pat on the back and a "get back in the game kiddo".
A few years ago, I went to counseling. And the psychiatrist told me that I had "separation anxiety"(whatever that means). Here I am...for the second time in 10 years SEPARATED from everything that I believed to be true..and I'll be damned if I'm not feeling anxious. This time feels differnt though. I feel more and more alone...more and more isolated. Hiding among the crowd I guess.
I don't really have a point to any of this...just some shit that has been on my mind and heart. I'm sure plenty of you have felt the same at one point or another...if so...raise your hand...if not? you probably stopped reading 2 paragraphs ago
I'm out.
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It gets better player. All jokes aside, if the committee contributed to that 'get back in the game' mentality, then I for one apologize for my part and the others too. I told you when you embarked on this road...it would be a long, frustrating, and tiresome journey. Willfully, you'll emerge victorious and sane.
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