Getting Off Your Own Dick

Its so cooooooold in the P!!!!! What it look like folk? Its ya main square back again with these here chronicles. Old man winter has finally laid his kiss on Philadelphia. We have our 1st real snow of the winter. I took the above picture right before I walked into work. Schools are closed and I can wager a lot of people won't be in to work today. My job is way out in like suburban Philly and its a bitch to get here. The african dude isn't here today. So that has me reconsidering making the journey up here today. Cause for those of y'all that have worked with or around Africans....you KNOW its fucked up when the African dude ain't there. But, nonetheless we still have some bidness to get down to. Shall we?

As you can see, todays topic is getting off your own proverbial dick. I say proverbial to make it clear that this is not just a problem dealing with men. I have a couple of instances that I experienced recently that made me want to address this.

As readers of the blog know, I was recently at my brother in laws wedding. What I didn't touch was the interactions I saw involving my wifes family. The majority of the people there for my wifes brother were from his fathers side of the family. But that's where it gets tricky. My wife and her brother are the only children by their dad that have the same mother. Now keep in mind, this nigga has 5 children from like 4 different women. All of these children pretty much hate the dad. All for different reasons, but mostly cause the muthafucka wasn't around. The oldest of the children was one of the groomsmen. But I noticed in the program that his name was hyphenated. My wifes maiden name first, followed by another name. Now, I knew that his mother had been remarried so I didn't pay this any mind.

Fast forward to the events after the wedding ceremony(I say events because there was no reception...I'm still pissed about that). I fell within earshot of a convo between my wifes father and his oldest son. Seems daddy dearest is mad that his son took on another mans name. I laughed to myself having heard several accounts of the fathers wrongdoings, I found the exchange highly amusing.

Dad: I see you changed you're name. Why?
Son: because that's who I am
Dad: no really you're not.
Son: well in my mind and how I see it this is who I am

This was followed by the son just walking away. Then I got to thinking, who the fuck was this dude to question his son about anything? Here he was around all of his children(except 1) and none of them are paying him any attention. Beset on all sides by grandchildren(many of whom he was seeing for the first time) his failures shining brightly in his face, and this nigga had the audacity to feel some kind of way about his kids turning their back on him? Get off your own dick nigga. Sidenote: later on the father and his brother(who is on his own dick as well) were sitting within earshot of my wife and I trying to figure out what my wifes married name is. Ain't that some sad shit? 1 that he didn't know, and 2 that his relationship with his daughter isn't strong enough for him to ask. Eventually my wifes aunt(one of the few people inthis familial equation with sense) asked my wife our family name. Sheeeesh....people.

Now onto a female being on her own dick. Before I start I will say, women rarely get on that tip, unless its over a nigga. as is the case in this other example. Now, this one takes place in my job. Here where I work there are a lot of interoffice romances, affairs, an jumpoffs. Anywho, this girl was dating this guy, things went south, they broke up. Dude decides he wants to holla at this other chick, and promptly puts his bid in. He didn't get too far with the new chick so he decides to go back to the old chick. Now the old girlfriend is walking around with her peacock feathers spread out like she won the prize. Not knowing that the other chick wasn't really interested in dude like that anyway. So in reality YOU look like the fool for trying to stunt on the chick, why? Cause he's STILL tryna holla. If you got off your dick for a second you would see that. Now this is 2 fold though cause dude was on his dick somewhat thinking he was gonna slide his way from one set of draws to the next. But I guess he had to try, right?

Well there we have it folk. Just fall back a little and try to see things from the next mans angle. See why you AIN'T the shit, and you'll find out why you are. Ya dig? Also before I go I want to shout out some folk that been spreading word about The 925 Chronicles. First and foremost my muse...the battery in my back, my wife Quiana aka Butterbear. Also shout out to my mom, even though I'm embarrassed she reads this with all the foul language. Shout out to Tis(check his blog out http://www.scienceofmagnetic.blogspot.com/), Rick aka Monsta Don(blog coming soon), Mel, Nakia aka Sunny aka Whistles(where the blog at son!?!?), and last but not least the homegirl Tee. Aiiight y'all, I'm out.